Crazy Beautiful Life

The thing that is really hard, and really amazing, is giving up on being perfect and beginning the work of becoming yourself

Monday, July 16, 2007

Rollercoaster....

I never realized what a rollercoaster of emotions dating can be. I have been seeing this guy for almost a month now and while it is going really well, its so confusing and wonderful and frustrating all at the same time! haha. Anyway since I am sure you are all curious, we met at work, yes it is the same guy I discussed earlier, apparently that is just his natural self, he doesn't mean to be flirty thats just how he is, I called him on it and yeah he didn't even realize. He really is an amazing guy, and I love being around him. We have so much fun together and I love the beginnings of relationships, the playful banter, the firsts of everything, its just fun! But then there are the other dips and valleys of this roller coaster, like the uncertainty of everything, that I am not a big fan of. Sometimes it is so hard just to know what to expect or what to think, especially since I am a major worrier and overthink just about everything! lol. I don't know, when I'm not with him, I miss him, I just miss being around him and its exciting and fun and terrifying all at the same time. I don't know what is going to happen when I go back to school and head back to Watertown but I am hopeful and excited for whatever the future brings. Just thought that you guys would like an update on whats going on here in Aberdeen, really that is about as exciting as it gets around here, which for me is pretty exciting. haha Anyway hope all of your summers are going well and having fun, for some of you I will be seeing you in a couple weeks for camp! major excited for pethat although somewhat scared as well because I think I am going to be the camp nurse but it should be fun and I am sure everything will go off without a hitch. Not sure how many people actually check this thing anymore since I rarely ever blog but to those of you who do, hope your summers are going well and families are doing good, miss ya, love ya!

Friday, June 22, 2007

The Market...

So to many of you who read this post, okay probably all, the market to you may be the grocery store, but for us single women out here to me the market to me refers to the market of single men and let me tell ya the selection is poor! I have recently come to the conclusion that men are so extroardinarly different from women that it is sometimes hard to believe we can co-exist at all! Take for example the male species does not seem to realize that there are boundaries to how far one should flirt, simple flirting is okay for friends, co-workers etc but this does not involve touching, seeking you out for talking, joking with you, talking about getting together to cook you a freaking cheeseburger! this does not constitute simple flirting, this has jumped another step to flirting when you are actually INTERESTED in someone. I do not think men understand this, how very frustrating it can be for us single women who are torn between wondering does he like me, is he interested or is this just another big ol' game we play in the land of single people. I am so ready to be off the singles market, it really is not a fun place to be, the hem and hawing of wonder and worry. I know I have posted about this single drudgery before and this really isn't to prod at that again because I think i have beat that dog to death, no sense in rehasing it again, this post is mainly to enlighten everyone (which you probably don't need enlightenment you have probably all been there before) that men need to get a clue! lol, hope everyones summers are going well, miss everyone, love you all!

Saturday, June 2, 2007

UGGHHHH!!!!

Well for those of you who are interested I am surviving Aberdeen although at this moment I wish I was anywhere else but here. I am so mad. My new bike which my good friends who were good enough to pick up for me in Sioux Falls has already suffered damage due to two cousins who don't know how to keep their hands to their own stuff and thought it would be fun to do tricks on my new bike! So needless to say I am quite ticked off right now, not that it is even that big of a deal but my brakes are now squeeky, yay. Before tonight they were perfectly fine and my bike was a smooth riding, beautiful machine and I have ridden almost every day without fail because I really do love it. Not that it will prevent me from riding it but now I will get that lovely irritating noise of "sqqquuuueeeeeaaaakkkk." Sorry thats really all I have to say, i just needed to vent, I promise I will write more about what life is really like as soon as I get past the red haze in front of my eyes called anger. Love you all, miss ya

Monday, May 21, 2007

Steal My Heart

Some of you may not know this but I decided to move to Aberdeen for the summer to work here and stay with my aunt and just kind of get away from everything and have a relaxing summer. Anyway my last Sunday at church I told miss Chloe Jane that I wouldn't be around this summer because I was going to be living somewhere else and she proceeded to tell me "I am going to miss you tomorrow" (tomorrrow because that was the day I was leaving. Anyway my good friends Kristi and Cindy were also less than pleased with me that I was going to be gone the WHOLE summer with really no plans to make trips home. Anyway just before I was heading into training for my new summer job I quick checked my phone messages and this is the message I received:
Um...Jenny...this is Chloe.
When are you going to come back?...
Jenny?... um, when you get back will
you come to our house?.. bye....
I love you, bye.


As you can imagine my heart immediately soared and it made my day. Shortly thereafter though I had to email Cindy and tell her that she played dirty, using a little girl like that to guilt me into coming home, haha. Cindy promptly told me she had nothing to do with it and that was all Chloe's idea. How adorable! I love that kid!! haha. This little girl is the sweetest little thing and I count it such a blessing that I have been able to be in her life, as well as all her siblings and cousins but Ms. Chloe Jane truly does hold a special place in my heart. Needless to say I think that message will remain on my phone for all eternity, haha, I have already been making people listen to it!


Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Woo Hoo Orlando here I come!!! (again)

So me and my cuz have just finished booking ourselves a vacation to Orlando, FL! She has never been there and I of course have been there a few times... haha... Anyway we got a GREAT deal on this little vacation. Our flights were 223, we are getting our hotel for four nights and it is only going to cost us about 100 bucks for the entire week because she works at a hotel reservation company (where I am working this summer) and we get excellent deals on hotels! Plus we are going to my favorite place on earth, DISNEY WORLD! for a day and then to this sweet killer water park one day called wet n' wild, and believe you me it looks amazingly fun!!! In addition to this we are taking a day trip to Daytona beach which is causing us about 25 dollars round trip to take a bus there for the day, it is going to be amazing! So we are getting a round trip flight, four nights in a Ramada hotel, a day at disney world, a day at the water park, a day trip to daytona beach all for only about 450 dollars! plus food but still i am totally pumped! Just thought i would let you all in on my vacation plans, its not until July, which means it is going to be a scorcher but yeah...it will be amazing nonetheless! :D

Sunday, April 15, 2007

Who I really am...

Pastor Steve's message today realely convicted me, and I have to say I have been feeling that way for awhile...just knowing that I have not been doing my part, haven't been reading my Bible, haven't been praying, have just been the biggest BUM! Well I finally remedied my not reading my Bible and have been going good for about a week straight now...I need to really take a class though in getting the deeper meaning out of reading, I just don't feel as connected as I would like to...anyway back to the intention of this post....Pastor Steve's message just really got me thinking...who am i really? Am I the person that you see at church or is that just a facade? I don't like to think so, I would like to think that I really am as nice and cheerful as I seem (no I really am not trying to pump myself up but bare with me plase lol) The thing is is that I know that I work harder when I am at church to come across like the happy go lucky person that I think people see me as...and that is the person I want to be, the person I aim to be but is that the real me? I know that when I am with my mom or some of my other family I can come across as the biggest butt head that you wouldn't even think I was the same person and you would think my evil twin just entered the room and took over my body or something! And I don't know why I do that and each time I lash out I am immediately convicted and the Lord says to me why...why do you treat your mother this way and I feel awful! but that stupid pride of mine just doesn't want to give in and say mom i'm sorry for being a butthead...I don't want to be that person...and I have really been trying to improve upon that aspect of my personality because I don't like it in myself. So who am I really? When God looks to my heart is he pleased with what he sees? Does He see promise there or is he disgusted with me as he was with the Isrealites who refused to step out in faith and just believe? I want to be the christian that He has planned for me and I want to receive the blessings the Lord has planned for me but how can I do that if I don't spend time with him and if I don't set my heart right with God? I don't want to be imprisoned anymore by selfishness and pridefullness, I just pray that the Lord sees me through and gives me the strength and spirit to be the person he has planned.
(The above is just an exampe of the prison I have allowed myself to be in. Haha...actually this was taken before the end of school last year but I thought it was a fitting photo)

Sunday, April 8, 2007

Remarkable People

We all have them, the people who have touched our lives and hearts in ways that we can never repay. For me there have been several: my mom, my grandma, my aunts, my best friend. I am sure the list for yourselves is just as great. There are two people in my life though that I feel I owe a great debt of gratitude for. Please beware this may be a tad mushy, for those of you who go into shock with great sentiments you may want to stear clear. Anyway I guess I should maybe start with a story. I was born into a catholic family, went to CCD all throughout elementary and high school and was confirmed as a Catholic but never really felt a deep connection with God, never really knew that to get into heaven you had to accept Jesus as your savior. Now I always believed in God, always believed in Jesus but just really didn't have some of the necessary basics down. Throughout this period of time though I had the fortune of meeting some amazing people, the Grantham's, who I ended up babysitting for since Brody was about one so yeah its been a long time! Anyway to make a very long story short after my grandma died I was really lost, searching, wondering, sad and missing her a lot. That is when Cindy asked me to go with them to Disney World with all of her family plus all of her brothers and sister's families as well. Needless to say that was an amazing trip (so fun!) and I was able to really connect with more members of Cindy's family. That summer I ended up babysitting for Kristi all summer and all through that next year as I decided I couldn't go back to Aberdeen after my grandma had died and needed to just kind of take a year to decide where I wanted to be. Anyway through all of this process I got a lot closer with both Cindy and Kristi and got to know them more as people, what they were about, what they believed, the strong sense of faith they have and it all just overwhelmed me and made me want to be more like that, happier, more loving and caring, just a better person. In about January of that year I went with Cindy and Wesley to Financial Peace which was the starting point of me finally coming to church and accepting Jesus as my savior. Now you may think that is the gist of this story, but unfortunately (since I know this is going really long, sorry bout that) that is not really what I wanted to talk about, I just had to get the background info out of the way. Through all of this amazing journey Kristi and Cindy have been there for me more than I can ever repay. I have never really had a strong christian example other than my grandma and even she practiced her faith in a different way, didn't read her Bible but had a very strong faith in God and Jesus. Cindy and Kristi have pushed me to be a better person and a better christian and I am eternally grateful that they took a chance on me, trusting me with their children and loving me even though I didn't know Jesus. To some of you this post may seem unnecessary and overdone but I think that we need to tell the people who have helped us beyond measure that theyve done so, because otherwise they may never know. They have always been there to answer my questions, ease my fears and push me to be stronger and do better. Thanks guys for always believing in me and loving me through it all, you guys are the best! (okay mush is over, thanks to those of you who pushed through!!! :D lol)

Friday, April 6, 2007

Photography

As some of you might know I love taking pictures, to me it is one of my absolute favorite pasttimes. It is more than a hobby to me, it is a passion and someday if it is in the works for me I would LOVE to be a photographer, it is yet to be seen if I am talented enough and so forth, we will see. Anyway I just love the creativity of it, I love finding different angles and ways to create something and make it beautiful and memorable and something that people want to keep forever! Anyway I have been taking pictures for family and friends doing a little here and there, making birth announcements for a friend and doing some of my cousin's senior pics and then designing her graduation announcement. Here they are, tell me what you guys think! I really like this one, it was something a little different than the other ones we did but we tried to match the font color with her turquoise/teal shirt, hopefully we were successful!


This is a birth announcement I did for my good friend Gwen, it was so fun! I was able to take pictures of this sweet bundle of joy and then design the announcement, it was a great time!


This I have to say is my alltime favorite! I just love the way it turned out and I think some of it has to do with the fact that I love the font that I put her name in! haha Anyway that is really all I have for now, maybe I will post some more of my stuff some other time! ENJOY! :D

Tuesday, April 3, 2007

Struggling...

Okay so I hate admitting this because it makes me feel like a complete failure but I have been STRUGGLING for the last two months to read my bible. Honestly I don't think I have even opened it in how long and it makes me sick with myself. I go to bed each night feeling totally convicted and guilty because yet again I have put off spending time with my Father. I don't even know why I do it because I actually enjoy reading the Bible stories but for some reason it feels so much like a chore to me, like the daily homework assignment I have to be sure and complete before the day is over. I know that I shouldn't look at it like this and I hate that I do, but ever since I have taken that step to give my life over to God, it has been a continual struggle for me to stay focused and steadfast in reading by Bible. I have tried different devotional books, doing the daily life journals, just reading the Bible of my own accord, starting where I want and reading through but nothing seems to have helped! I feel like a complete loser! I am sure that it has something to do with the fact that I wasn't raised reading the Bible, I always believed in God but reading the Bible wasn't something that my family did and truth be told my family isn't very religious in and of themselves, I am pretty much the only one that attends church and has a close relationship with God. I know you live by example and the example I have just isn't great. Don't get me wrong, I believe my family is great and my mom has taught me a lot of things about life and she has a great heart and I know that she knows God and Jesus as her savior, but to her she doesn't see the need to go to church and read her BIble, but I believe her heart is right, anyway that is off the subject.... I need something, I don't want to continue in this rut and not spend time with God, I mean I am supposed to help teach a group of young girls about the importance of their relationship with God and spending time with Him and reading their Bible yet I myself struggle with the concept, talk about hypocrite. Anyway if you guys have any ideas at all I am open for suggestions!

Saturday, March 24, 2007

Another year older...

Well today I have turned one more year older to the whopping age of 23, I know can you even believe it? lol Birthdays are a funny thing, when you are young they are something to look forward to, anticipate and celebrate to the fullest with all of your friends and family but once you get older it shifts somewhat and you don't really know if it is something you should go all out and celebrate, throw a party, have fun, be young or sit back, relax, enjoy the view and all that life and God has brought you throughout the year. Of course I am sure it could be a little bit of both, for me birthdays are kind of sad though. When I was younger it was such a great day, you got recognized in school, at home, from your friends, everyone knew it was your birthday. Then that night me and my family would usually go out to eat to celebrate, dinner resturaunt of my choice of course and we just celebrated as a family. I remember when that shifted and I didn't really care too much about celebrating with my family but wanted to be with friends instead, my own fault of course. But now as I sit here I wish those days were still around, instead I am the only one home, mom and Pat in Wyoming, one brother in Minneapolis and the other in Vermillion. I am not asking for pity so please don't think I am throwing myself a pity party, which looking back at this post it does indeed sound lik one (so sorry folks lol). It just really makes you look back and value the things that you once looked over and thought of as nothing, took for granted. BUT alas another year older just means another year to improve upon the things that get you down, make you restless, make you mad, upset, or all of the above. As for me, I really want to take this next year and make something of myself, I want to be dedicated and in charge of myself enough to know that I can succeed at losing weight and becoming the person that I want to be and the person that other people see in me. I don't want to be afraid anymore, not that I am afraid in a sense that I am quivering in my boots or anything but I get nervous in new situations, I clam up, don't talk, act like a buffoon and it honestly takes me awhile to open up...I never used to think I was a shy person and I honestly still don't really but I just get nervous about what to talk to people about...I know annoying habit. Anyway thanks for bearing with me through this post, it was kind of long and tedious! Hope you all are doing well and enjoying this blessed rain we have falling down on us!

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Me and My Cuz

Okay so I am very close with my mom's sister Ivey and her family, I have frequently spent weeks at a time at their house during summers and when I lived in Aberdeen for a year going to school once a week I went out to their house to have supper, hang out and usually spend the night. I have just always been very close to their family, Ivey is kind of like a second mom to me and I am frequently told that I am more like her than my own mother...and she frequently likes to tell me that she OFTEN took me off my mother's hands when she needed help while I was young. Anyway, her oldest Ashley and I are pretty close, at least I like to think so, sometimes it is pretty difficult because there are extenuating circumstances that sometimes make it not the easiest of relationships. I guess the main thing being that my aunt's family is apostolic (my aunt married my uncle Gary who was apostolic and then she converted). As you can imagine though this makes it at times difficult to have a "normal" relationship. I guess it is kind of hard to explain. Sometimes it is hard just because it is hard to break through those barriers that seem to envelope them, they have their own little segregated group so to speak and a lot of their views are different and they have strong views on a lot of things (they don't cut their hair, they don't wear make up, they don't watch TV or movies-- just a lot of thigns that I tend to enjoy and fluorish in, I love cutting my hair, love make up, LOVE watching TV and movies, haha) But even through all of these "hurdles" so to speak, we have gotten to be good friends and we generally have a good time together anyway. Sometimes I feel more comfortable in their family then my own, at least until my aunt starts on one of her rampages that is...haha just kidding ivey. In all honesty though Ashley is kind of like a sister to me. We used to think we were so cool because for a long time we were the only two girl cousins out of 10 grandkids! but then her younger sisters came along and kind of busted that up. Even though she can be trying beyond words at time and sometimes I would rather throttle her than hug her...I guess that is what family is about, loving each other despite your differences and being thankful that someone is there, no matter what hurdles, differences or barriers.

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Grey's

OKay...yes I am a die hard Grey's Anatomy fan and may I just say what in the world?! After two weeks of no new episodes they come out with THAT tonight? I mean don't get me wrong, it was a great episode but no way in h-e- double hockey sticks are george and izzy supposed to be together!!! I mean seriously what in the world...are we going to have a rerun of the same crap that happened with george and meredith where he stayed bitter and angry george for a whole year? because pretty sure I can't go through that again, they are only supposed to be best friends, not lovers!!! On the other hand i loved the stuff with meredith and her dad, i hope they finally resolve their relationship :D anyway I know this is probably not something you guys really have a heart to read but I hadn't posted anything in awhile and this was currently all I had on my mind... haha

Monday, February 26, 2007

Where to go from here

Okay so I know I don't graduate for another year but lately I have been doing a lot of thinking about where I want to go from here... For as long as I can ever remember I haven't really wanted to go anywhere, just wanted to stay in my own little corner of the world away from all of the crime and craziness that so much of this country seems to experience but we in South Dakota are, for the most part, able to abstain from. But lately I have had this itch, to get out and see things and explore this big world that I live in and experience something other than my tiny existence. Don't get me wrong I love South Dakota and I know that I could probably happily live here forever but what if I am not supposed to? I know that it is going to take a lot of praying about this to ask for God's direction in where I am supposed to go and what to be doing with my life but I am scared, terrified actually. The farthest I have ever been away from my family was two hours when I lived in Fargo, ND and I absolutely hated it! Of course that was partly due to the fact that Fargo is way colder than Watertown no matter what anyone tells you. But I dont know...it has just been something I have thought about. Maybe my prince charming doesn't reside around here, maybe he is somewhere, anywhere out THERE! So yeah...that is my current predicament, even though I don't have to worry about it for another year or so, it will take that long to figure everything out!

Sunday, February 25, 2007

Night Owl

It is currently 1 o'clock in the morning and I am not tired! This is a curse I live with from time to time when I just for the life of me cannot fall asleep or really am not even tired. I know it is because I, by nature, am a night owl anyway and my sleep schedule is pretty off anyway, I go to bed at all different times of the day (night) and sleep in way too late...I think this must be a college thing. I don't even know why I tend to stay up so late because it isn't like I do anything worth while or fun while I am up....such as this I am currently watching House season 2 on DVD....I know extremely interesting. The problem with this habit of mine is that I currently now only have about 7 hours of sleep to get in before I have to get up for church and I am most definately not a morning person and function way better on 8-9, sometimes even 10, hours of sleep. So if you see me in church on Sunday and I seem to be lagging just a little bit, please forgive me and just give me a swift kick! haha

Sunday, February 18, 2007

Alone or just Lonely?

Okay so most days I am pretty content with who I am, where I am in my life and what I have...but some days I am just down...not in like I am so depressed and can't imagine my life ever getting better kind of depressed but just lonely down. I love going to church because I love being surrounded by the people and feeling God's presence in every turn and the sound of Worship and children learning about Jesus, it is amazing. I love seeing the families together, making plans with other families to go out to dinner or make a play date, a sleepover or some other fun and exciting thing that children and families plan together. But there is a part of me that is so envious of that....wishing that I had a place in that part of life! I don't mean to sound that I am not completely grateful for all the blessings I have in my life because I so am....but some days are really hard for me. It is hard to sit and wonder when, who, how, where am I finally going to meet that special guy, the one I get to start my own family with...I so look forward to that day, sometimes it totally consumes my thoughts and feelings and I get way overwhelmed until God sets me in place and says love ME first, think about ME first and THEN he will come. I have complete faith in the promises the Lord makes and I know that someday it will happen but it is just days like today when I get really impatient to make those plans myself to have playdates and make plans for dinner and sleepovers and all the other wonderful things that go along with parenting and having a family. Don't get me wrong, I am not completely delusional to the fact that its not all sunshine and roses, I have babysit enough to know its not like that all the time, and that there are a lot of hard times too...i have been through enough of them with my own family, but the promise of that security and love is really.....amazing.

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Scrabook Layouts

Hey here are a couple of my earlier scrapbook layouts, not sure how well these will come out, my more recent stuff is back in watertown so Kim you will have to wait for inspiration from those until later! haha These next two layouts are from my disneyworld trip with the Arnold clan, it was so much fun!

This one is from when I worked at a home daycare for a year while I was going to school in Aberdeen, it was such a great experience but it made me realize I could never do daycare for a living, I love kids but that is not my thing!
This last one is one of my favorites! I was babysitting at Kristi's house and the kids were playing outside, Cindy's kids were also there, anyway before I knew it I came outside and they looked like this:

Playing in the Snow

There is something so amazing about a fresh snowfall. The snow is so beautiful and pristine and it just sparkles with all the amazingness that God has to offer! While most of the time I am an avid hater of the cold of winter, after a new snowfall you can't help but smile, it is just so beautiful! Me and my best friend, Chrissy, decided to take advantage of it and just have FUN! Sometimes in college it seems like there is never time to enjoy the simple pleasures of having fun, especially with your best friend. It was so fun, we tromped around, freezing our buns off but it was such a good time to enjoy it and take pictures and not worry about homework assignments, check offs and tests for an hour! I loved it. Chrissy is amazing, she has been my best friend for years now and its been so much fun, she is more like a sister to me than my own sister, definately more friendly :P She has been there for me through everything! Through my grandma's death, which was one of the hardest things I ever had to endure, my fighting with my dad and occasionally my mom, through a time when I didn't think I was ever going to overcome my anxiety issues and would die always worrying about something! And I even had the pleasure of showing her around my favorice place on earth, DISNEY WORLD! Me and her took a trip there a couple of years ago and it was so much fun! Sure we have had our ups and downs, what family doesn't right? But through it all I have known that she was going to be there, that we could have our stupid humor and laugh at each other when we are being so stupid or not even have to say anything at all. That is what friends are for I tell ya. I guess I just needed a reminder of that....and nothing says it best then romping through the snow with each other, getting snow EVERYWHERE and freezing it out together. God is so amazing that he gives us people who know us and love us despite all our faults. One of my favorite quotes by Ralph Waldo Emerson goes like this "It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them." I love it because it completely describes my friendship with Chrissy, we can be stupid and it doesn't matter, we love each other anyway!

Monday, February 12, 2007

Smooth Talker

Okay so I know you all know what I am talking about, the guys that can basically talk you into anything even if you don't need it, don't want it and definately can't afford it! Okay so I am in my apartment, trying to hurry up and get my stuff ready because I had to meet my clinical group in like ten minutes to leave for Sioux Falls where we had clinical. All of the sudden I hear a knock on my door and STUPIDLY just went right ahead and opened the door and there he is...the smooth talker. Immediately he has a big smile on his face, extremely charming and he starts talking to me about how he needs this certain amount of points so he can start his own business and then he says to ask him how he can earn these points, so I did and he starts talking about these magazines that I can buy and yeah so pretty soon he asks if he can come in and again I stupidly say yes and he is like so what would you like to get and I am like well there isn't really anything I need or want and so he tells me that I can send a magazine over to the troops and then he will get a bonus 500 points! SO i am like well sure I can send a magazine to the troops but just pick the cheapest one. Well before I know it I am shelling out 50 bucks for a magazine that I wont even get to read and that I would never approve of so this guy can get his dream of owning his own stupid business! Seriously how gullible can one girl be for a charming smile and a little flattery? Ridiculous I tell you...I need a lesson in saying no.

Sunday, February 11, 2007

This is me!

Hello my dear friends and family! I don't know how many of you will actually be reading this, but to those of you who do, welcome! I decided to do this after my friend Kim told me about what fun it is and as if I don't have enough to do I thought it would be fun to start a blog, because while it is for other people to learn about the happenings of my life, its also just a nice place to vent or let my creativity flow if I so desire! Anyway for those of you who do not know I am in Brookings right now with about a year and a half to go until I finally complete my Nursing degree! Praise the lord because I am SO ready to be finished with school! I guess I don't really know really what I have too much to say right now. On a slightly less enthusiastic note, I just found out that this guy that I used to have a major crush on is now engaged...i know probably not a big deal at all but its just kind of sad. He has quit school so that he can pay off his school loans before he gets married. If you want to get married great but why throw away the rest of your life? You can have your cake and eat it too, there is no reason why you should have to give up your dreams and make something of yourself for another dream. Maybe I am being a little overly dramatic but I think it is true. If you want to be able to support your family you have to be able to make something of yourself. Plus he is only like 21! Okay so yes jealousy does have a little something to do with this because I am more than ready myself to be in a serious relationship and settle down but that is besides the point...Anyway I will get off the soap box now...I wanted to show you guys some pictures from my apartment, where I have been living since the end of August. It's actually a great apartment and pretty reasonable, I think my room is bigger than my room at home! Soon though I will have to give it up because after May I will be moving back home for my final year of school. The picture to the left is a picture of my bedroom, I decided to redo my decorating when I moved in and went with the simply shabby chic collection from target which I have to say I absolutely have loved! its just so fun and girly and plus I got the added benefit of finding all the accessories, I find a three basket combination on clearance, a beautiful mirror that I absolutely love from the same collection that was also on clearance. Really thats about it but it was so much fun shopping for all of it! This is my dresser and TV which I really don't use all that much, the TV that is...mostly I just watch TV in the living room, but anyway just thought I would giveyou a little preview of that! :D This picture to the right is a picture of my kitchen, which suffices in terms of kitchens go I suppose. It is actually pretty big and we have a gas stove and oven. The only bummer part is that we do not have a dishwasher and sometimes our dishes definately tend to pile up, but seriously when do two nursing students have time to do dishes! Between check offs (that is when we have to perform a certain nursing task in front of an instructor and we either pass or fail, yeah if you want to talk about nerve racking), homework and tests we definately do not have time for dishes. Anyway I guess that is about it, just a little piece of my life! Hopefully I will be able to have some interesting things for you guys, that was just a little introduction to me. :D