Woo Hoo Orlando here I come!!! (again)

So me and my cuz have just finished booking ourselves a vacation to Orlando, FL! She has never been there and I of course have been there a few times... haha... Anyway we got a GREAT deal on this little vacation. Our flights were 223, we are getting our hotel for four nights and it is only going to cost us about 100 bucks for the entire week because she works at a hotel reservation company (where I am working this summer) and we get excellent deals on hotels! Plus we are going to my favorite place on earth, DISNEY WORLD! for a day and then to this sweet killer water park one day called wet n' wild, and believe you me it looks amazingly fun!!! In addition to this we are taking a day trip to Daytona beach which is causing us about 25 dollars round trip to take a bus there for the day, it is going to be amazing! So we are getting a round trip flight, four nights in a Ramada hotel, a day at disney world, a day at the water park, a day trip to daytona beach all for only about 450 dollars! plus food but still i am totally pumped! Just thought i would let you all in on my vacation plans, its not until July, which means it is going to be a scorcher but yeah...it will be amazing nonetheless! :D

Who I really am...

Pastor Steve's message today realely convicted me, and I have to say I have been feeling that way for awhile...just knowing that I have not been doing my part, haven't been reading my Bible, haven't been praying, have just been the biggest BUM! Well I finally remedied my not reading my Bible and have been going good for about a week straight now...I need to really take a class though in getting the deeper meaning out of reading, I just don't feel as connected as I would like to...anyway back to the intention of this post....Pastor Steve's message just really got me thinking...who am i really? Am I the person that you see at church or is that just a facade? I don't like to think so, I would like to think that I really am as nice and cheerful as I seem (no I really am not trying to pump myself up but bare with me plase lol) The thing is is that I know that I work harder when I am at church to come across like the happy go lucky person that I think people see me as...and that is the person I want to be, the person I aim to be but is that the real me? I know that when I am with my mom or some of my other family I can come across as the biggest butt head that you wouldn't even think I was the same person and you would think my evil twin just entered the room and took over my body or something! And I don't know why I do that and each time I lash out I am immediately convicted and the Lord says to me why...why do you treat your mother this way and I feel awful! but that stupid pride of mine just doesn't want to give in and say mom i'm sorry for being a butthead...I don't want to be that person...and I have really been trying to improve upon that aspect of my personality because I don't like it in myself. So who am I really? When God looks to my heart is he pleased with what he sees? Does He see promise there or is he disgusted with me as he was with the Isrealites who refused to step out in faith and just believe? I want to be the christian that He has planned for me and I want to receive the blessings the Lord has planned for me but how can I do that if I don't spend time with him and if I don't set my heart right with God? I don't want to be imprisoned anymore by selfishness and pridefullness, I just pray that the Lord sees me through and gives me the strength and spirit to be the person he has planned.
(The above is just an exampe of the prison I have allowed myself to be in. Haha...actually this was taken before the end of school last year but I thought it was a fitting photo)

Remarkable People

We all have them, the people who have touched our lives and hearts in ways that we can never repay. For me there have been several: my mom, my grandma, my aunts, my best friend. I am sure the list for yourselves is just as great. There are two people in my life though that I feel I owe a great debt of gratitude for. Please beware this may be a tad mushy, for those of you who go into shock with great sentiments you may want to stear clear. Anyway I guess I should maybe start with a story. I was born into a catholic family, went to CCD all throughout elementary and high school and was confirmed as a Catholic but never really felt a deep connection with God, never really knew that to get into heaven you had to accept Jesus as your savior. Now I always believed in God, always believed in Jesus but just really didn't have some of the necessary basics down. Throughout this period of time though I had the fortune of meeting some amazing people, the Grantham's, who I ended up babysitting for since Brody was about one so yeah its been a long time! Anyway to make a very long story short after my grandma died I was really lost, searching, wondering, sad and missing her a lot. That is when Cindy asked me to go with them to Disney World with all of her family plus all of her brothers and sister's families as well. Needless to say that was an amazing trip (so fun!) and I was able to really connect with more members of Cindy's family. That summer I ended up babysitting for Kristi all summer and all through that next year as I decided I couldn't go back to Aberdeen after my grandma had died and needed to just kind of take a year to decide where I wanted to be. Anyway through all of this process I got a lot closer with both Cindy and Kristi and got to know them more as people, what they were about, what they believed, the strong sense of faith they have and it all just overwhelmed me and made me want to be more like that, happier, more loving and caring, just a better person. In about January of that year I went with Cindy and Wesley to Financial Peace which was the starting point of me finally coming to church and accepting Jesus as my savior. Now you may think that is the gist of this story, but unfortunately (since I know this is going really long, sorry bout that) that is not really what I wanted to talk about, I just had to get the background info out of the way. Through all of this amazing journey Kristi and Cindy have been there for me more than I can ever repay. I have never really had a strong christian example other than my grandma and even she practiced her faith in a different way, didn't read her Bible but had a very strong faith in God and Jesus. Cindy and Kristi have pushed me to be a better person and a better christian and I am eternally grateful that they took a chance on me, trusting me with their children and loving me even though I didn't know Jesus. To some of you this post may seem unnecessary and overdone but I think that we need to tell the people who have helped us beyond measure that theyve done so, because otherwise they may never know. They have always been there to answer my questions, ease my fears and push me to be stronger and do better. Thanks guys for always believing in me and loving me through it all, you guys are the best! (okay mush is over, thanks to those of you who pushed through!!! :D lol)

Photography

As some of you might know I love taking pictures, to me it is one of my absolute favorite pasttimes. It is more than a hobby to me, it is a passion and someday if it is in the works for me I would LOVE to be a photographer, it is yet to be seen if I am talented enough and so forth, we will see. Anyway I just love the creativity of it, I love finding different angles and ways to create something and make it beautiful and memorable and something that people want to keep forever! Anyway I have been taking pictures for family and friends doing a little here and there, making birth announcements for a friend and doing some of my cousin's senior pics and then designing her graduation announcement. Here they are, tell me what you guys think! I really like this one, it was something a little different than the other ones we did but we tried to match the font color with her turquoise/teal shirt, hopefully we were successful!


This is a birth announcement I did for my good friend Gwen, it was so fun! I was able to take pictures of this sweet bundle of joy and then design the announcement, it was a great time!


This I have to say is my alltime favorite! I just love the way it turned out and I think some of it has to do with the fact that I love the font that I put her name in! haha Anyway that is really all I have for now, maybe I will post some more of my stuff some other time! ENJOY! :D

Struggling...

Okay so I hate admitting this because it makes me feel like a complete failure but I have been STRUGGLING for the last two months to read my bible. Honestly I don't think I have even opened it in how long and it makes me sick with myself. I go to bed each night feeling totally convicted and guilty because yet again I have put off spending time with my Father. I don't even know why I do it because I actually enjoy reading the Bible stories but for some reason it feels so much like a chore to me, like the daily homework assignment I have to be sure and complete before the day is over. I know that I shouldn't look at it like this and I hate that I do, but ever since I have taken that step to give my life over to God, it has been a continual struggle for me to stay focused and steadfast in reading by Bible. I have tried different devotional books, doing the daily life journals, just reading the Bible of my own accord, starting where I want and reading through but nothing seems to have helped! I feel like a complete loser! I am sure that it has something to do with the fact that I wasn't raised reading the Bible, I always believed in God but reading the Bible wasn't something that my family did and truth be told my family isn't very religious in and of themselves, I am pretty much the only one that attends church and has a close relationship with God. I know you live by example and the example I have just isn't great. Don't get me wrong, I believe my family is great and my mom has taught me a lot of things about life and she has a great heart and I know that she knows God and Jesus as her savior, but to her she doesn't see the need to go to church and read her BIble, but I believe her heart is right, anyway that is off the subject.... I need something, I don't want to continue in this rut and not spend time with God, I mean I am supposed to help teach a group of young girls about the importance of their relationship with God and spending time with Him and reading their Bible yet I myself struggle with the concept, talk about hypocrite. Anyway if you guys have any ideas at all I am open for suggestions!